#225 – We have the power to direct our minds to replace the feelings of being upset, depressed, and fearful with the feeling of inner peace. –Gerald G. Jampolsky

Change the way you think  by learning to identify negative thoughts and changing them to a positive affirmation. This  can actually change the way you feel about yourself and your situation and add joy to your life.

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#224 – Happy accidents have a way of changing your life for the good.

The older I get, the more I realize that people who have a lot of success also have a happy accident or two in the beginning of their career that changes their life. Only requirement is that you have to be out there working for it to happen.

Read my e-book Evaleen from Rags to Riches.  She also had a few happy accidents.  Available at:   http://tinyurl.com/a5zvzpx

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#223 – “Those who listen well may reap both informational and relational benefits that make them more influential.” Journal of Research in Personality – Columbia University

When subjects were asked to rate former work colleagues, scientists found those with the most influence were the best listeners not talkers.  The reason? Hearing what colleagues have to say fosters two key elements for gaining influence: forming trust and learning new information.

Read the adventures of a woman who made it the hard way at:

Evaleen From Rags to Riches  http://tinyurl.com/a5zvzpx

 

 

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#222 – The Secret to Getting Rich is Great Savings Habits. Jonathan Clements

Most wealthy Americans get there by saving diligently month by month.   Something to remember when you’re tempted to spend your money on something you don’t need and that will give you little pleasure in the long run.

 

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#221 – Dare to be different, to be wrong, to look wrong.” Howard Marks, Billionaire Investor

If you want great results, you have to take a chance  on all of the above.

Evaleen – From Rags to Riches, a work of fiction who does all of the above and more in her effort to succeed.

Now available at Amazon.com at: http://tinyurl.com/a5zvzpx

 

 

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#220 – The way we think determines who we are and what happens to us. From: The Reflecting Pond

Being angry or negative hurts you more than it hurts anyone else. If you can possibly do so,  replace your destructive thoughts with hope-filled, positive ones.  What I know for sure is that the more I let go of being upset about people or things I can do nothing about,  the happier and more peaceful I am.

Check out my e-book, Evaleen – From Rags to Riches.  It’s about a young woman who struggles to succeed in spite of really difficult circumstances.  It’s available on Amazon at:  http://tinyurl.com/a5zvzpx

 

 

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#219 – Those who go out of their way to listen to what others are saying, experience greater success. Dr. Adam Grant

If you want to make a good impression,  practice making a conscious effort to hear and understand what someone is saying to you.   This alone will make you stand out.

 

 

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#216 – You only lose what you cling to: Buddha

According to the Buddha, all suffering comes from clinging too tightly to people or things.   By letting go you can stop obsessing about things you have no control over and be at peace.

Peace to you today.

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#215 – Failure is not the opposite of success but a stepping stone to success. Arianna Huffington

“It’s okay to try things and fail,” she said, stating on “Katie” that some of her biggest successes appeared to be huge failures at first.

Check out my book, Evaleen – From Rags to Riches, for the story of someone who personifies this tip.

Available at: http://tinyurl.com/ccsemgn

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#214 – “Forgiveness is the Key to Happiness” – A Course In Miracles

The more you let go of your old grievances, the happier and more at peace you will be.   Life is too short to worry about things you can do nothing about. Better to forgive and forget for your own peace of mind.

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213 – Care about what other people think and you will always be their prisoner. – Lao Tzu

There will always be naysayers, people who have their own reasons why you shouldn’t do something or be someone.  Avoid them if you possibly can.

check out my e-book, Evaleen – From Rags to Riches,  a work of fiction about a young woman’s journey to become successful both in her private life and in business in spite of her terrible circumstances.    http://tinyurl.com/a5zvzpx

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#212 – Trust Your Stuff – common baseball saying

When coaches tell pitchers to trust your stuff, they mean don’t try to be perfect. Do your best and trust that it will work out. If there is a setback, continue to trust that you are already good enough to be where you are.

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#211 – “Embrace Your Mistakes” – Sara Blakely, founder of Spanx

According to a University of Colorado Denver  study, organizations, as well as people, who fail spectacularly are more likely to flourish in the long run because they  learn more from failure than from success and retain the knowledge longer.   Or as that old saying goes, “If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again.”   Good luck!

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#210 – “Throughout life people will make you mad, disrespect you and treat you bad. Let God deal with the things they do, cause hate in your heart will consume you too.” Will Smith

There will always be someone who doesn’t like you or approve of you at one time or another.  “Don’t get too affected by them or even allow them to bring you down. Just let it go, and move on with life. Let God, or if you don’t believe in God, let the universe deal with them on its own.” This from Will Smith.

Check out my e-book, Evaleen – From Rags to Riches to see how she deals with this problem.

Check out Evaleen – From Rags to Riches: http://tinyurl.com/a5zvzpx

 

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#209 – If you don’t like something, change it; if you can’t change it, change the way you think about it. Mary Engelbreit

When I get to obsessing about something that I can do nothing about, I do simple math problems in my head. This changes my focus from the right side of the brain (the feeling, intuitive side) to the left side of the brain (the detail-oriented, logic side). The result is usually peace and a good night’s sleep. Give it a try and see if this works for you when thinking about someone or something is keeping you up nights.

Check out my e-book Evaleen – From Rags to Riches available at:  http://tinyurl.com/a5zvzpx

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#208 – Don’t rush to judgement.

First impressions are not always correct. Friendships, love affairs and relationships in general take time to develop.

 

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#207 – “You don’t have to get it right the first time.” Jane Pauley

The brain learns from failure. If you never had any failure in your life, you probably weren’t trying hard enough.  Speaking of learning from failure, Check out Evaleen – From Rags to Riches: http://tinyurl.com/a5zvzpx

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#206 – a negative attitude toward others can never bring me success. Napoleon Hill

Even if you don’t say a word, people can sense if you don’t like them or are judging them harshly.    Better to think positive about them if you possibly can, especially if you must deal with them on a regular basis.

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#205 – “People are about as happy as they make up their mind to be.” Abraham Lincoln

You can choose to be happy and have an attitude of gratitude or you can concentrate on the negative and moan about your fate.  We all have good and bad in our lives. Happiness is a choice.

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#204 – Help Yourself by Being Kind – Bill Taylor

Small gestures can send big signals about who we are, what we care about, and why people should want to affiliate with us. It’s harder (and more important) to be kind than to be clever.

Happy holidays and don’t forget to be kind to yourself too.

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#203 – “It’s normal to feel vulnerable when you’re in a period of change.” Brene Brown

It’s okay to be scared and uncertain. It just means you are in a period of change when anything can happen. Uncertainty is a necessary part of getting where you want to go.

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#202 – “Don’t let your emotions rule you.” Warren Buffet

What upsets you today could change tomorrow.   Acting on an initial emotion often leads us to do things we regret and can cause trouble later.    Give yourself time to reflect before jumping to conclusions.

 

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#201 – “I don’t know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everybody.” – Bill Cosby

You can’t please everybody any more than you can like everybody. Nor by the same token, can everybody please you or  like you. Those are just the facts of life. Best to face it, learn whatever you can from it,  and move on.  Life is way too short to worry about things you can do nothing about.

 Check out my e-book: Evaleen – From Rags to Riches now available on Amazon at: http://tinyurl.com/a5zvzpx  

Posted in happiness, Inspiration, life and love, life coach, Motivational, Positive Thinking, Self Help, Success

#200 – How you stand displays your power or lack of power. Dana R. Carney, Amy J.C. Cuddy, Andy J Yap

“That a person can, by assuming two simple 1-min poses, embody power and instantly become more powerful has real-world, actionable implications. Go  to the following website to see both high power and low power poses.

http://www.people.hbs.edu/acuddy/in%20press,%20carney,%20cuddy,%20&%20yap,%20psych%20science.pdf

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#199 – “Being vulnerable is the magic sauce that holds relationships together.” Brene Brown

She also said that vulnerability is about showing up and letting yourself be seen for who you really are. It’s tough to do when we’re terrified about what people might say or think.   But by letting people see who you really are, your life could be incredibly enriched.

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#198 – I am not what has happened to me. I am what I choose to become. ~Carl Jung

Everyone I have ever known has had problems in their family and in their life. In addition, there will  always be people who do not approve of you. It’s just life. Don’t let that stop you from becoming who you want to become. 

Check out my latest e-book: http://bit.do/CrazyLittleLies Now available as an e-book on Amazon.

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#297 – You can choose comfort or you can choose courage. Dr. Brene Brown

But you can’t choose both.  It’s a lot easier to do nothing than it is to actually stick your neck out and take a chance, but if you you don’t try, for sure nothing will happen.

Check out my latest e-book: http://bit.do/CrazyLittleLies

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#296 – Major ways to lose face. From: Practical Magic

Lying to ourselves or others; Constantly seeking validation from others; Talking or thinking negatively; Tolerating people, things or situations that are bad for us;, Having ridiculous expecations of ourselves or others; Taking life too seriously.

These are also some major ways to make you fail in life in general.

 

 

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#295 – “Progress is impossible without change.” George Bernard Shaw

Ask yourself what is and isn’t working for you.  And if something isn’t working, make an effort to try something else.

Speaking of someone who must constantly change to succeed, check out my e-book.  Evaleen – From Rags to Riches.  http://tinyurl.com/a5zvzpx

 

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#294 – To find out if someone is telling the truth ask a yes or no question. From: The Super Easy Lie Detector by Ian Stables

According to Stables, a liar will always avoid answering a simple yes or no question.  Also in his book are some strategies to box a liar in and force an answer that may also reveal if someone is telling you a lie.

Check out my e-book:  Evaleen – From Rags to Richeshttp://tinyurl.com/a5zvzpx

 

 

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#292 – If you just try and be stubborn about trying, you can do what you set your mind to do. Sonia Sotomayor

This comes from an interview she did on 60 minutes. Coming from the rough and tumble world of the Bronx, she is a living example of what being stubborn about trying can do.

Check out one of my e-books today about a woman who also struggles stubbornly to succeed.

Evaleen – From Rags to Riches: http://tinyurl.com/a5zvzpx

 

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#291 – Follow your negative thought with a positive one.

If you are becoming obsessed with negative thoughts about someone, try following your negative thought with a positive one about them if you possibly can. People can sense when you don’t like them and sometimes you have to deal with them no matter how you feel.  Try this and see if it changes the dynamic between you.  If nothing else, you will feel better.

Check out my e-book: Evaleen – From Rags to Riches: http://tinyurl.com/a5zvzpx

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#290 – Most great people have attained their greatest success just one step beyond their greatest failure. Napoleon Hill

As Dale Carnegie also said, “Most of the important things in the world have been accomplished by people who have kept on trying when there seemed to be no hope at all.

Check out my latest e-book Chez Tulips Stories and Recipes: http://tinyurl.com/brnevxh

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#289 – “If you Can’t See It, You Can’t Be It.” Gloria Steinem

Might be a good exercise to see if you can actually visualize yourself being successful.  And if not, why not?

Check out my latest e-book, Chez Tulips – Stories and Recipes. It comes complete with a simple and delicious recipe for Chocolate Truffles among others. Available at:   http://tinyurl.com/brnevxh

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#288 – Financial security brings more happiness than buying things does.

Research shows that older people’s less materialistic spending habits are one of the biggest reasons that happiness increases with age.  Long term peace of mind is more important than the temporary thrill of buying something you really don’t need.   And from my own experience, I know that there is no anxiety quite like that of being broke and worrying about money.

Check out my new e-book, Chez Tulips – Stories and Recipes.  The truffles are simple to make and wonderful.  http://tinyurl.com/brnevxh

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#287 – “You can’t hold grudges.” Ben Affleck.

“You must forgive and at least try to forget if you want to get ahead in life,” Ben Affleck said last night in his speech at the Academy Awards.  A favorite line of mine from the Course of Miracles is: Forgiveness is the key to happiness.

Check out my latest book, Chez Tulips – Stories and Recipes at http://tinyurl.com/brnevxh

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#286 – Amateurs view anxiety as a bad thing while professionals tend to view it as a good thing. New York Times Magazine

Science of elite performance studies have shown that people who feel anxious during a test actually do better. That same study states that their anxiety and insecurity help them focus.

So it’s okay to be nervous and insecure, just don’t use it as an excuse to quit.

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#285 – Find a way to break down a massive project into smaller sub-projects.

It’s easy to get lost in the details and overwhelmed by a large project. Find a way to break it down into smaller projects and work on one piece at a time. This will give you a quick win and a feeling of accomplishment. At the same time you will be chipping away at the big project, which chip away enough, and you will get it done.

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#284 – A surplus of effort can overcome a deficit of confidence. Sonia Sotomayor, Supreme Court Justice

This is the sort of information that contributed heavily to Sonia Sotomayor becoming a supreme court judge.   When she became a federal judge in 1992, she says she was so terrified, that her knees were literally knocking together.  She grew up in a housing project in the Bronx in a dysfunctional family. The one thing she said she learned was to depend completely on herself.

Check out my latest e-book, Charlotte Perkins – Gold Digger, now available at Amazon.com  Only $2.99 http://tinyurl.com/anabr4o

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#283 – Take care of the little things and the big things will take care of themselves. Robert Griffin III

Just happened to hear this today from an interview with this football player.  So no need to worry about the outcome, just do the work little by little and it will get done. 

Make me happy – purchase my e-book Evaleen the Queen or Charlotte Perkins – Gold Digger or Running Away to Santa Fe, all available at Amazon.com for $2.99 each.  All three books are about women who, like me and most everyone else I have ever known, struggle to succeed against difficult odds.

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#282 – “Don’t think don’t think. Just do the work.” Bette Midler

Don’t over think, don’t worry or doubt whether what you’re doing is good or not, just forge ahead and do the work.

By the way – Happy Holidays.    I love doing Tuesday Tips.  They keep me going and hope they keep you going too.    Sandra

Check out my latest e-book, Charlotte Perkins – Gold Digger at:    http://tinyurl.com/d67mzt6

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#281 – “Write a day in your life five years from now.” Sarah Little Turnbull

Write down where you live, where you work, whether you have kids, and  try to describe an ordinary day. This will help you think what is possible for you.

Check out my latest e-book, Charlotte Perkins – Gold Digger.  http://tinyurl.com/d67mzt6

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#280 – You’re always responsible for the effort — not the outcome. Mary Jo Copeland, Founder, Sharing and Caring Hands.Org

You aren’t in charge of the outcome.  All you can do is make the effort and hope for the best.

Charlotte Perkins – Gold Digger http://tinyurl.com/anabr4o

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#279 – Advice from young me to old me. Sandra Rector

I wrote this when I was in my fifties after dealing with both my mother and my mother-in-law. I revisisted this list  recently and now at 73, I am trying to take my own advice.

Keep your aches and pains to yourself unless you’re  in need of immediate help.

If you need daily help, try to spread it out among more than one person so that one person does not become resentful.

Always try to do your share and hold up your half.

Don’t forget to say please and thank you.

Do your best to plan financially for your  old age.

Don’t pretend you’re 20 years younger than you are.

Don’t dress like you’re 20 years younger than you are.

Do not discuss the past endlessly.

If someone does something nice for you try to do something nice for them in return.

Try not to repeat yourself.  Be aware of the social cues such as the bored look, the raised  eyebrow that says that they have heard this before.

Do not wear low necked clothes.  After a certain age, it is not dignified or flattering.

Keep careful track of your money and what you are charging on your credit cards.

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#278 – “Consider how hard it is to change yourself, to see how little chance you have in changing others.” Ben Franklin.

Sometimes you just have to accept the fact that the only person you can  change is yourself.  This little prayer from AA helps me when I get to worrying about somebody else’s behavior and reminds me to mind my own business.

“God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference.

Charlotte Perkins – Gold Digger http://tinyurl.com/anabr4o

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#277 – Listen twice as much as you speak. Old proverb

Something magical happens when you listen more than you speak.  You come across as wise, caring, concerned, interested, the list goes on and as a further benefit, you might learn something.  

Check out my new e-book – Charlotte Perkins – Gold Digger : http://tinyurl.com/8rjdma2

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#276 – Let go and forgive – Wisdom from 100 plus ladies

So many little things get to us that really aren’t that important in the end. And let’s face it. Nobody’s perfect. We’ve all hurt others or held a grudge about something when someone has hurt us. Think how peaceful we would be if we could just let it all go.

Check out my latest e-book.

Charlotte Perkins – Gold Digger :  http://tinyurl.com/8rjdma2

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#275 – If you could do one thing, what would it be? Jerry Yang, Yahoo

Something to ask yourself when there is too much going on, too many things to do. This is a way that you can focus on what’s really important.  “You can’t rationalize the answer and you can’t attach it to some other things,” says Jeff Weiner, CEO of Linked In, This was in the business section of the New York Times, Sunday, November 11, 1212.

Check out my latest e-book on Amazon, a story about a woman trying to make it against terrible odds.

Charlotte Perkins – Gold Digger:  http://tinyurl.com/8rjdma2

 

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#274 – Success consists of going from failure to failure without loss of enthusasim – Winston Churchill

If you want to be successful in life, you have to keep trying to get better, learn more, keep trying new things.   I have learned from my own experience that if you think you can’t do this anymore because it’s so hard or you are feeling especially burned out from all the work and little result, this is also the time when most people give up.  If you can get past that bump, there is a good liklihood that you will make it the rest of the way. 

Check out my latest e-book, Charlotte Perkins – Gold Digger, a book about a woman who also succeeds in spite of great difficulties.  http://tinyurl.com/8rjdma2

 

 

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#273 – Being at peace is happiness. Wisdom from a 100 year old lady

So many little things get to us that really aren’t that important in the end. And let’s face it, nobody’s perfect. We’ve all hurt others or held a grudge about something when someone has hurt us. Think how peaceful we would be if we could just let it all go. 

Check out my latest e- book, Charlotte Perkins – Gold Digger, available at http://www.Amazon.com

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